Winter Dancing
by Aurora White
Summary: And those who were seen dancing, were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music. -Friedrich Nietzsche. Written for Jily Secret Santa 2012.


**Title: **Winter Dancing

**Pairing:** James/Lily

**Rating:** K+

**Summary:** And those who were seen dancing, were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music –Friedrich Nietzsche

**Secret Santa Gift to: **Collette, glassvasevigilante at tumblr

**Disclaimer: **Everything belongs to the incredibly talented J.K. Rowling.

It was a long time ago, the memory tucked away in the far corner of your brain. You remember, with a wistful sigh, the picture perfect scene of your parents dancing, with no music, but still lost in a world of their own.

You didn't understand it when you were younger, nor did you quite get it later on, but you longed to find someone with whom you could share such an intimate moment. And you knew, that once you found him, he'd be it.

Of course you had gotten much more realistic over time, what with the war and all. You knew you shouldn't expect to be able to find your one true love, your soul mate. And so you took all of those fanciful dreams and touching dances and locked them away in that distant corner, hoping never to be tempted.

But they never quite left, the memory and the wishes. Sometimes, on a rainy day, when you were alone, hidden and safe in a cozy alcove in the library, you brought them out again. And you dreamed and you hoped until your heart ached to the point you just could not bear it any longer.

Then you'd leave, your day ruined, reflecting the gloomy weather outside. But then there was that year. That crazy, wonderful year. When that stupid, annoying prat who just couldn't take no for an answer, finally managed to make you say yes. And you saw everything about him in a new light. His pranks became amusing, his best friends, rotten boys who you couldn't stand, rapidly befriended you. His hair, once the bane of your existence, suddenly became the most gorgeous thing in your life. But nothing beat his smile. His beautiful smile that was real, and much too large for his face, and made his twinkling eyes crinkle up in the corners, and when he flashed it your way, you felt your knees give way just slightly. You heard your brain telling your heart to shut up, shut up, shut up.

But it didn't. And eventually that initial attraction slowly turned into something more, something deeper. You found that it actually hurt when you were apart, because he wasn't only your boyfriend, but he was also your best mate.

You hadn't had a best friend in a while. You had almost forgotten what it was like. The girls in the dorm came close, but you never really let anyone into your heart in fear that they'd leave. Everyone left you. Your sister, your parents, Severus. You didn't think you'd be able to withstand yet another heartbreak. In spite of that, you still found yourself spilling everything that you had kept hidden, spilling it to this boy who cared and listened and maybe, just maybe, he'd stay.

But sometimes you still doubted him, doubted that he'd always be there. You couldn't help it; it was a reflex. And sometime you thought that he could tell, thought that you could see the pain flash in his eyes, and then leave as he smiled at you again, but it wasn't the same smile. And you hated that, because you honestly, truly didn't to hurt him. Just thinking if it made your chest ache and your heat pain and all of a sudden you were experiencing too many feelings, feelings that were too fast and strange and confused you and really just shouldn't be happening.

Then came that one December day, when you both just happened to have stayed at school during the holidays. The grounds were wet, and cold, and gross and all you really wanted to do was curl up on a couch next to him, sip stolen hot cocoa, and maybe read a book because you were Lily Evans and you enjoyed staying dry. But he had other ideas because he was James Potter and he enjoyed pushing your buttons. And after enduring his pathetic begging and moaning, honestly that boy had too much determination for his own good, you gave in and bundled up in your nice thick cloak, hat, and Gryffindor scarf, which just might have been James', and let yourself be whisked away, pitifully attempting to hide a smile.

The minute you stepped out of the Entrance Hall, the two of you were met with the icy, sharp wind, so cold it felt like all your layers were useless. Quickly putting Heating Charms on the both of you, James dragged you toward the edge of the Forbidden Forest, and, realizing your protests were futile, you complied.

Sometime between you leaving the castle and reaching the small clearing in the trees, it had begun to snow. You watched as James looked up at the sky with a child-like awe before turning around to look you straight in the eye with such an intense look your head felt dizzy.

"May I have this dance?" he asked with that bloody, awful, brilliant grin.

You asked something about the lack of music, still in slight shock from his look and his grin.

He scoffed, "Does there have to be?" before promptly pulling you into his arms and leading you in a waltz.

You weren't sure if it was possible, but his smile was even more blinding when you were this close to him, and his pinewood and peppermint smell made you positively lightheaded. You couldn't help but notice how perfectly the two of you fit together. You heard him speak, his deep voice reverberating on the top of your head, which was tucked snugly into the crook of his neck.

"I'm not leaving, you know. I'm going to stay next to you until the day we die."

Your breath hitched. "Wh-what are you talking about?"

"I know you think I'm going to go someday. But I won't. I won't ever leave."

And all of those strange, confused feelings suddenly hit you once again, with full force. Except, it was different now. You finally understood what they meant. They meant that this boy, this man standing in front of you, was your one love, your soul mate, _your dancing partner._ And as this realization spread through your mind, a smile spread across your face. It was an incredible smile, big enough to challenge the one quickly reappearing on James' just then.

"I think I just may possibly love you," you told him a bit breathlessly.

"I know."

It wasn't nearly that funny, but you threw your head back and you laughed, a joyous laugh that rang though the trees because you knew that this was the happiest you had ever been in your life.

SNAP! The bright, white light of a camera flash made the two of you look up, still giggling.

"What the hell are you two doing?" you heard Sirius call out. "It's bloody freezing!"

"Says the one taking pictures in the snow!" you shouted back, still giddy with the excitement of your newfound discovery.

Muttering something about a scrapbook, Sirius turned on his heel and walked back to the castle.

After reuniting with the warmth of the couch and fire in the common room, the two of you looked at the picture Sirius had taken. You thought it was beautiful and showed your love for each other in a way words never could.

"We are most definitely keeping this picture."

"Who knows? Maybe we could pass it down to our future child, yeah?"

**A/N: **This is my first attempt at fan fiction so I sincerely hope I didn't screw it up too bad. Reviews are appreciated, as well as constructive criticism. Merry Christmas, and happy holidays Collette!


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